5 Love Languages


You may have heard of Gary Chapman's 5 Love Languages theory, if not I summarize it briefly. Firsts of all what does a love language mean? According to Gary Chapman we have 5 fundamental ways to give and receive love.

Words of affirmation - verbal compliments, words of appreciation, expressing our loving feelings towards our loved ones with words - 'I love you' 'You can always make me laugh' 'Well done for doing so well in that test' 'I love the way your hair looks today'

Quality time - giving someone your undivided attention - not watching television next to each other, not having dinner while being glued to your phone but looking at each other and talking, sharing ideas, plans, thoughts without any distractions

Acts of service - expressing love by doing something for somebody that they would appreciate - cooking a meal, setting the table, taking the car to service, doing the school run, washing those smelly football boots, keeping the house tidy to name a few

Receiving gifts - the visible symbol of love, something that you can hold in your hands or look at and say 'He/She remembered me, thought about me', the gift itself is the symbol of that thought

Physical Touch - in Yoga Philosophy the element of air is related to the Heart Chakra (stay tuned for future blog posts on the Chakras) and it's relating sense is the sense of touch. Touch being directly connected to the heart has a healing effect on us - a gentle massage, sitting close to each other touching, holding hands, kissing, embracing, intercourse are all a way to express love through touch

Why is this important to us? We need to have a little bit of each of the 5 languages in our lives but we primarily have 2 that we focus on. If we do not receive love in our two primary love languages we may not feel loved at all! Now, we generally express our love in OUR primary love languages to others, as that would make US feel loved. The problem comes when these languages are not matching, and we all speak a different language, not understanding each other.